And then there was this...

I'd have to say that one of my favorite and only main hobbies is Paintball. I mean what other sport is there that allows you to run around shooting people (legally). And after you are done, you wipe it off, and start again. It's easy. No real athletic ability is needed (but it sure is helpful). Think about it. You don't have to be fast. You don't have to be strong. All you really have to be is able to walk and carry a gun. Piece of cake, Right? I always thought so. Until...This past outing. Let's see, I started playing a year ago. I made it through the whole season with only one major bruise on the inside of my leg. Okay, so what if it lasted almost a month. It was still only a bruise. Not bad for the amount of games we played. Then I got sent to San Diego, and didn't get to play again.

It seemed like this year took forever to get started, and the weather to get good enough for us to play. But finally, we decided to play on February 17. The weather looked like it would be okay. It was a bit cool, but the biggest thing was the rain in the forecast. Luckily, we got missed. It had t=rained previously, but Friday was pretty clear.

I was late showing up to the field. I missed 2 games, but we still had plenty of time for several games. The first game I was in was a win. I did, however get put out in the second game. It was a helmet shot, so there was no pain. Third game was a win. Then came the fourth and final game for me. Things are going good. We usually travel in pairs, and this was no exception. I just so happen to be following Gary, and we realize that we are not in a good position to attack. It's time to move in and get closer. One of the worst places to be is at the top of a hill, so since I had to go over one, I thought I should try to do it quickly. I am at the top of the hill, and try to find the clearest path to the bottom, where Gary was. Since it had been raining the previous days, I knew if I took too big of a step, I would slide down to the bottom, and who knows what that would cause. I was being cautious. Small steps all the way down. No problem, right? YEAH WHATEVER!!!!! Apparently, as I was taking my baby steps, I baby stepped myself right under a root or a vine or something. My left foot got hung. It stopped right there. Needless to say, the rest of me did not...

At the start of my fall, my left foot was facing forward (toes pointing forward). However, When I landed (stopped falling), my foot was laying on it's inner side, and my toes were now pointing to my left. To top it all off, it was underneath me. I, as well as Gary heard a pop, crunch, or break of some sort. My first instinct was to look for any manglege or deformity. Everything looked normal. My toes moved inside my shoe. My foot moved also. I thought, That's good, I sprained my ankle. Picture it. Here I am laying on the ground in pain, fallen, and I can't get up. Gary asks me if I am okay. I can only grunt out a "nope". Things are looking rough, but we're not finished yet. You see. There are still about 4 other people out there with Semi-Automatic Paintball guns. And they just so happen to be looking for who? You guessed it...Me and Gary. So I can't even take my helmet off, yet for fear that I will get pelted with a barrade of paintballs (I hope that's a words). Gary tries to get their attention. He sees one of them, and calls his name. He just looks at him not knowing what to do. It must be a trick. Then Gary sees 2 other barrels. There were 3 shooters on us already. He calls again to try to stop the game. Finally, the other guy answers, and they stop the game to come help.

Still, I am on the ground. I guess I forgot to mention that the terrain we were on was all but flat. I still have to try to get out of there. What to do? What to do? One of the bigger guys decides to take one of my arms over his shoulder, while a significantly smaller guy takes my other arm over his shoulder. We were going to try to hop out. I, being as lucky as I am, just so happen to be what seemed like a mile away from the road. A mile? Well, pain makes people exaggerate. So we're off. Up the hill. Down the hill. Up the hill... Keep your foot off the ground Putz!!! Down the hill.

I finally had to sit down and take a rest. By now, my right leg was starting to hurt from having to carry my limp body out of there. I had help, but it was still a lot of weight and work. One of the guys helping my suggested I go home and soak my foot in Epsom Salt the rest of the day and over night. That would take care of the swelling. Once I sat down, My hero of the day, Jake came out to help. He stood me up, hoisted me over his shoulder and carried me the rest of the way out. Way to go Jake. He sat me down in the bed of a truck. I removed my shoe and sock. One of the geniuses of the group decided that Ice would be needed. Good job Neutron Bomber. He also thought it would be a great idea to secure it to my leg USING DUCT TAPE!!!!
I have to say that was not done in my best interest. The hero shortly corrected that. They played one more game, while I sat in the truck bed.

As I lay as motionless as possible, I decide to call the doctor to get in. I inform the nice lady that I was playing Paintball, fell, and damaged my ankle. Her reply was something like I hope you don't want to see him today." I tell her, "Uhh...Well I kinda hurt my ankle today..." Note the fact that this is Friday. So she is expecting me to wait until Monday, when he will be in the office again. Yeah, that's possible. She tells me they can try to work me in at around 4:00. That gives me almost 4 hours to lay there. I thought I had better find something to keep me busy.

After the next game, hero came back and carried me to the car, my car. In the process, I did manage to kick my left foot, not pleasant... After I got in the car, I drove to Sonic to get a drink. Then office to the Credit Union to withdraw some money to pay my one year overdue chiropractor visit ($250.00). I drove by there to drop off the payment. It is now 1:20. Apparently, they take lunch from 1:00 - 2:00. I guess I'll just sit. Upon their return, I call them, and ask the lady to run outside to collect the money. I was in no shape to walk inside. Now, it is time to go home for about an hour.

At the doctor's office, they bring me back for some x-rays. Luckily, Camille had broken her ankle before, so I had a pair of crutches at the house, and was using them to get around. Anyway, the nurse comes out, and just looks at me smiling. She throws my film up on the light thingy, and says, "Do you see that?" Then she points out where the sprain was. It was right beside where the Broken Fibia was. It appears what I thought was a sprain was a broken leg bone. My first thought... "Soak it in Epsom Salt". It's off to the ER I go. Dr. Ramprasad comes in and sees me and my x-rays. He decides he wants a few more. He decides Surgery is the best fix. Just a plate and 4 screws, he said. He scheduled it for 1:00 the next day. That means no food after Midnight, and be at the hospital by 9:00am to get prep'd. The nurse then says it is okay, if we are a little late. (She must know us.) No problem.

Saturday:
I get the hospital about 9:30. Nothing in my stomach. Still in my PJ's for comfort. At 12:20, they decide to give me my IV. Did I mention there was nothing in my stomach? After torturing my with needles trying to get my IV started, the nurse decided to try to get someone else to do it. Success... It is now 1:00 and there is no anesthesiologist. This goes on and on for quite some time. To make a longer story long, I'll just tell you I didn't get in to surgery until after 5:00pm. And, did I mention I had NOTHING IN MY STOMACH!!! So I can relate to those who have to sit in a waiting room an hour for a 3 minute test. I feel your pain.

I ended up having to stay the night in the hospital. However, they did provide me with a happy button. It was a button I had to push every 15 minutes to get a dose of demerol. The only problem was that I could never tell, if it had given it to me or not.. Anyway, I made it through that okay. I now have a metal plate in my leg secured by 5 screws. I know. I know. Dr. Ram said 4, but put 5. I hope that last one was free. As a bonus, he included 15 staples. Yep... Plated, Screwed, and Stapled. If you are ever curious as to what that looks like, see below.